So for the past few days I have been consumed by a feeling of a need for closure...the last word...something. I have been thinking for her birthday I should send her some sort of note of good will...happy birthday...best wishes...especially since I got NOTHING from her. I do wish her well...just not in my life...well somewhere else...ugh
I think I should do it. Make it uncomfortable for her that I was the bigger person to acknowledge HER birthday and give her some best wishes. Let her know that I am sorry that we drifted apart years ago and that I hoped that Doug would bring us together again...but instead her relationship with him just amplified our differences. That I want her to be happy in life and that although we are on different directions and have different views on things that I hope all her dreams come true.
Should I mention that I felt that I felt as if she was the most selfish person I have ever met...probably not. That she is the most closed minded person I know...nah...
Ugh...what to say?
Definitely the need to say something. I have 2 weeks to think about it...ideas? Maybe some other day.
Today was my moms birthday. Got to see Paul and Jeannette for lobster dinner. Paul looks good, almost done with radiation and talked to his surgeon and all seems well. My mom is 77 today...scary...she is doing well though.
Christmas is coming and my schedule doesn't seem too bad so far. Hopefully it will be a good year. Clock ticking...mom is 77 and Andy's dad is still battling cancer. Not too much time left to get a son out to be an heir to the Haertel legacy. Ugh I hate pressure.
Things to remember: lobsters, wine, good times with my mom...rain for 3 days...a wonderful birthday and anniversary this year at Rush and Lafayette Hotel...closure
